Wednesday Wish List

It's mid-week and I've been shoveling my driveway thinking about the things I'd like to get my hands on right now that just might make my life a bit better. Maybe I'm in dream-land here but unseasonably bad weather makes me a bit cray cray.

1) I'd like to squeeze my butt into a pair of size 8 jeans. Any over priced brand will do, the point is that they be a size 8 and I fit into them for the rest of my adult life. Forever. Forever ever. 
If size 8 is good enough for Mariska Hargitay and Valerie Bertinelli then it's good enough for me. (Never mind that they're older.)

2) I'd like a miracle cellulite cream that actually works. Like for real. With modern medicine/technology can no one figure out a cream/potion/magic elixir that will make my dimple butt go away? Forever? 

{Boo. Hiss. These do not work.}

                                        

3) I'd like Marc Jacobs to come and design for me. Personally.  I will allow him to use me as his muse and maybe even his exclusive lovah. (What's that you say? He's gay?) Never mind then. Just being his style muse will do.

{Ignore Posh, insert Mama here.}

 Till then, (cuz I know he's working on Fall/Winter 2011) he can feel free to FedEx these to me at anytime. Freebies of course.

4) I'd like to pick up a new bike. Yes a bicycle. La Bicyclette. In order to fit into my size 8 jeans (forever) I'll be needing something in addition to a gym membership or Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred (which is actually more like an every 5 or 6 days if I'm feeling up to it Shred.)  Something new like this cruiser would be super-cute.

5) I'd like Kid #2 (who is now a bold 20 months old) to stop running into the bathroom, climbing up onto the toilet, then onto the counter and then into the sink while plugging the drain and turning on the taps. (Fully dressed and sitting in the sink.)

{No this isn't him. But I'm too busy cursing to stop and take a pic while he's up to his shenanigans}

6) I'd like my hair to look like this. Everyday. If anyone knows Ken Paves number please share. (We'll just pull him away from his world travels with Jessica Simpson on "The Price of Beauty."}

{Source, google images}

Blogging.... my Massive Weight Loss 2010 downfall?

So blogging itself only takes a few minutes a day, but since I've started re-hashing my every mindless  thought onto the interwebs I seem to be wasting wayyy too much time on the computer in the evenings. I don't even watch T.V. anymore (like that's such a valuable use of time)...if it weren't for our PVR, HBO, and the new seasons of Lost and the Biggest Loser, I'm pretty  sure I could toss the tube completely!

Currently I have two baskets of laundry glaring at me from the hallway...it's like they're saying, "damn right we're giving you the stink eye, get krack-a-lackin' and fold us already"!!!
Yet I continue to ignore them...and their buddies,  the pile of dishes in the sink. 
Is child neglect next? No, my contingency plan is to only blog in the p.m. after Kids #1 and 2 are off to dreamland.
Is this my self-made solution to being a stay-at-home-mama? Since I don't have a computer to sit in front of at work anymore, I suppose this a substitue of sorts?! (old habbits die hard, after years of sitting on my @ss at work in front of a comp.)

Jillian Michaels called me earlier tonight (my personal trainer extraordinaire from Biggest Loser fame).
Convo was as follows:

Ring Ring...

Mama: Hello?
Jillian: Hi this JM calling, from the 30 Day Shred workout DVD you bought a few weeks back?
Mama: Oh, hi.
Jillian: Um yeah, you dropped $14.99 on me and there was talk of Massive Weight Loss 2010 and vows to starve and tone before you leave for Hawaii on Sunday. You are still going?
Mama: Um, yes.
Jillian: Well I'm not sure we can let you get on that plane.
Mama:  oh, why not?
Jillian: Cuz your vows meant nothing. You're "working out" with that blog. That time in the evenings was intended for beatings, beatings, beatings. You can't in good conscience put on a bathing suit and think you're ok with it all. Am I right?
Mama: Mmmm, you might be right Jill.
Jillian: Kindly return the DVD and get your ca$h back. Flights cancelled.  Kisses and kind regards to your blog.              

 {JM don't give me that all knowing, "I'm fit and you ain't" smirk, you're only my virtual trainer, maybe I'll pick up Bob's DVD next...}

So long story short, I'm feeling a little guilty. My new "hobby" is a major time sucker.  I lurve reading and following other blogs, but at what cost?

Folded laundry.

Clean dishes.

Swept floors.

Fed children.